It's Inn the Details

Time Honored Tradition or Silly Superstition?

In the shadow of the multibillion-dollar wedding machine, it can be hard to tell real tradition from a made-up sales pitch.  Without question, the wedding industry has piled on the notion of paying to preserve tradition, when in fact, many of those high-priced traditions, such as the diamond engagement ring, don’t go back much further than the 1920’s.

Nonetheless, some traditions are real.  And like anything many traditions have evolved from old ideas that we may see as a little strange today.  For years, the joining of a bride and groom and the idea of starting a new life together, has been viewed as such an important development that a great deal of superstition has cropped up around weddings. 

The series of blogs to follow will look at many of our common practices, customs, traditions and supersititions.

• Custom - habitual practice of a community, established usage
• Tradition - practices passed from generation to generation
• Superstition - a belief based on irrational fears and marked by a trust or reverance for charms, omens or signs.

                  FYI - Tossing the bride for good luck is a silly superstition!

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Tradition or Superstition # 4 -To Toss or Not To Toss?

Today the tradition of throwing the wedding garter is down right tame in comparison to the 14th century. 

In England, guests would actually go into the wedding chamber and check the bride’s stockings for signs that the marriage had been consummated.  This charming custom was called “fingering the stockings.”

Even more fun in France where after the ceremony those cheeky French guests would rush the bride at the alter to snag a piece of her dress, which was considered a piece of good luck.   Mon dieu.

Now the bride usually wears two garters; one as a keepsake and the other to throw away.  Both garters are worn on the right leg just above the knee.  Before the removal of the garter, the bride first throws her bouquet to all the single ladies.  Cue Beyonce. Whoever catches it is supposed to marry next.

The groom removes the throw away garter from the brides leg, sometimes with his teeth or hand (my vote) while his bride is standing or sitting. As with the flowers the first man to catch the garter is supposed to marry next.

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Traditions and Superstitions #5 - Wedding Crashers

In times of old, brides were often not courted into marriage but instead they were captured during neighboring wars.  In these times, the duties of what we have come to know as the best man and the groomsmen were to protect the groom from the fury of those he had previously captured his future bride from.  They were ready to give up their lives to ensure the safety of the groom.

The custom of the bride standing to the left of the groom during the wedding arose from a need rather than etiquette.  During the ceremony the groom needed to have his right arm free to defend against any intruders who may have attempted to reclaim his future bride before the conclusion of the ceremony.

In ancient times the bridesmaids had a more ominous duty.  They were dressed in identical clothing. This was done in the hope of confusing the evil spiritis that may be decending on the bride.  The bridesmaids were ready to absorb any evil spirits that may have been ready to attack the bride.

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Tradition and Superstitions #6 - Carry Me Away

As it turns out, weddings in the days of yore sometimes followed kidnappings.  This explains not only the role of the best man but also why the bride and groom customarily leave the wedding celebration before everyone else.  It’s symbolic of the groom stealing away with his bride, taking her from her family and into a new life with him. 

In medievel Europe, carrying a bride into her new home prevented her from seeming too enthusiastic about losing her virginity.  By picking her up and taking her into their home, the groom provided an alibi for his wife’s chasity.

The threshold of the home was thought to be rife with unattached spirits.  A bride was considered particularly vulnerable to spirits especially through the soles of her feet.  By carrying her the groom was covering all his bases.

Much, if not all, of the original meaning behind a groom carrying his bride across the threshold has been lost in modern weddings.  The practice is more done with humour or as a photo op as today’s couples are not entirely sure why to do it.  But, it’s better safe than sorry right?

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